


Wedding Blues

by Anonymous



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Crack, M/M, One Shot, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-05
Updated: 2018-08-05
Packaged: 2019-06-22 06:29:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15575802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Stan and Ford finally get married.





	Wedding Blues

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written for the 100 words of Weddings thread on FFA.

“Congrats on your wedding, Grunkle Stan and Grunkle Ford!” cried Mabel. “I can hardly believe it’s happening! Though mainly because of how illegal it is.”

“And pointless,” added Dipper. “You already share last names, you already get hospital visitation rights because you’re family, neither of you pay your taxes, you don’t have any insurance...” He reached into the bowl of complementary chocolates and took out a couple. “Am I missing anything?” he asked as he unwrapped them.

“Hey, don’t look at me, Poindexter here’s the one who wanted the works,” said Stan grumpily. He picked at the cufflinks on his wrist. “Nnngh! Stupid fancy suit.”

“We’re getting married because it’s an important symbol of how we two are the only people in the universe who can truly understand each other, and also stand each other,” answered Ford, who sashayed in with his electric wedding dress. “Plus if Fiddleford gets to marry a raccoon then I should be able to marry my brother.”

“Well, it’s been a really great wedding so far!” Mabel replied. “I can’t wait to tear it up on the dance floor! What songs are up first?”

As if on cue, a noise like an anvil falling on a huddled mass of electric organs erupted from the reception area’s speakers. The wedding guests cowered on the floor, hands over their ears. Shmebulock, the ring-bearer, vomited.

Dipper spat out his chocolate. “Eugh! What is that?”

“That, my boy, is the opening strains of my favorite album from college, _Tarkus_ ,” answered Ford. “I’m having the wedding DJ play the entire suite as the opening number. You kids can go out and dance, if you like.”

Stan scowled. “Ford, if you play this on the boat I am throwing you overboard.”

Ford huffed and crossed his arms. “Fine by me, as long as you don’t play that Babba crap.”

“ _Now just you wait a minute--!_ ”

Mabel wiped a single tear from her eye. “Ah, love!”


End file.
